It's a Date?

Normally I'm not one to talk a whole lot about my love life, but trying to date in Japan presents some unusual problems that I thought might be interesting to some of you.

I recently met a girl and her 2 friends (one Japanese girl and one Indian guy who speaks fluent English) and we've all been hanging out bit. The two of us have been emailing (texting) each other a lot over the past few weeks. This is kind of difficult because I don't speak Japanese. Luckily, she's smarter than I am and can understand English, though it's rough at times. Long story short, we are hanging out tonight, but I still don't know if it's a date or who is all coming.

Anyway, here's the long story—our email conversations. Complete with emoji and original grammar ("C" represents her, "G" represents me):

Aug. 16, 7:32 PM

C: come back after sleep get up now

How meny lesson today?

G: Today is my holiday. what are you doing tonight?

C: holiday it good what are you doing?

This trip very tired I'd like to lie down tonight.

G: I think I will just watch a movie tonight

C: What movie is it?

I want to watch a night museum

G: I just watched a dvd. not a famous movie. maybe we can see night at the museum together sometime, what do you think?

C: It o k

I will go this time

(After much contemplating over what the hell that meant, I decided I had no idea if she was saying "yes" or if she already had plans to see it. So I just went with this:)

G: OK. have a good night Chieko!

C: good night

have a nice dream

Aug. 26, 10:23 PM (conversation in progress)

G: That is a hard swim! what are your plans for this weekend?

C: I have no plan.

Sunday is free

G: Did you see Night at the Museum yet?

C: ok

Do you wont to go another place Sunday?

(Thwarted once again! Did she see it or not?)

G: Sure, what do you think?

C: I do not hit

I takes you with a near place

(I finally think I've figured out that she saw the movie and we are making plans to do something else. Whether this is a date or if her friends that normally hang out with us are coming too is still up in the air.)

G: OK. We will think of something. sounds good! its a plan

C: I go to it to meet you Sunday

G: OK Have a good dream tonight, Chieko.

C: you tooGood nightGuy

G: Oyasuminasai

Aug. 28, 8:59 PM (conversation in progress)

G: I will eat soon. shower first.

What time should we meet on Sunday?

C: It is good anytime

G: Do you want to get dinner? maybe 18:30?

C: Yes I want to get dinner

When I watch a movie hungry

( ! So we are seeing a movie after all! Still unsure about the date thing.)

G: Sounds good!

C: ok

I go to your house at18:00

(Ok, I get it! You can drive and I can't!)

UPDATE:

It was totally a date (my first legit date since college) and the movie was much funnier than expected. Unfortunately I had to keep myself from laughing the whole time, because no one else was. I don't think American humor translates very well into Japanese subtitles.

Enjoy this likely unrelated quote:

"In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms."

—Stephen Jay Gould

My Life in Japan

My conversation with some dude on the street on the way home from the bar:

Dude: USA!

Me: Hai. USA.

Dude: Carifonya?

Me: No. Ohio.

Dude: Ohio! Kentucky?

Me: No. Ohio.

Dude: Parm Springs?

Me: No.

Dude: Green Day!

Me: Hai. Greenday.

Dude: Brinku Eititu

Me: Huh?

Dude: Ichi Hachi

Me: 18?

Dude: No. (pretends to write "1 8 2" on a fence)

Me: Blink 182. Ok. Oyasumi.

Dude: Goodnight!

Enjoy this likely unrelated quote:

"I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that."

—HAL, 2001: A Space Odyssey

Pseudo Symphony

I was thinking a bit about pseudo instruments today while riding back from the beach. While the air guitar gets most of the attention, (and rightfully so,) I thought I'd give my thoughts others that might not seem like the sexy option. I'm also going to leave out ever-popular broomstick guitar, with all it's variations, as well as the air mic (female variant: hairbrush microphone). I do need to mention the air mic for literally providing cover during the parts of the song you don't know the lyrics to.

So here they are,

The Most Underrated Pseudo Instruments

The air saxophone

If I had a nickel for every time I was caught without a saxophone while listening to INXS's "Never Tear Us Apart," or Wham!'s "Careless Whisper," I'd be able to buy my own saxophone.

The air piano

Probably the most technically difficult of the pseudo instruments. You actually need to know something about piano to play the air piano, otherwise you just end up looking like you're poorly typing. If you can master transitioning back and forth from air piano to air guitar during "Bohemian Rhapsody," then you deserve special permission to play two pseudo instruments for one song. Don't worry, your friends' complaints will be silenced once they witness the awesome.

The car drums

Nothing beats actually banging on things when fake drumming in the car (pun unintended). The back of the driver's seat, the dashboard, the steering wheel, shotgun's head—the options are limitless. Word of advice: call dibs on drums for Oasis's "Don't Look Back in Anger." If you're not sure why, think about how everyone argues over who gets to fake the guitar in Weezer's "Buddy Holly," simply because of the nine note solo near the end—it's like that. Also, try combining the car drums with the pen drums to create your own hybrid.

The KT drums

That's pronounced "kit" and it's an acronym for "kitchen table." These are great because you don't even need any accompanying music. All you need two pieces of silverware, a glass or two, the table, and some easily annoyed family members. (But use what you have; dishes and bowls add nice variety.) This should always be spontaneous—if you don't have the necessary equipment readily available, either improvise or fall back on "Wipeout" with your bare hands.

The seatbelt guitar

Possibly my favorite pseudo instrument of all time. Combining 2o^th century safety with awesome, the belt-tar makes for a convenient, tangible pseudo instrument when you're likely to need it most—in a car. You never know when "Sweet Child O' Mine" might come on.

Enjoy this likely unrelated quote:

—Carl Sagan, Cosmos: A Personal Voyage

iPods+

I just bought my first iPod the other day. This should come as a surprise to anyone who knows me, given my love for both music and Apple products.

So now I have a Nano. I had always wanted an iPod, it had just always been a money thing. Plus I thought I wouldn't get much use out of one, considering the music options in house and car that don't require an mp3 player. But then I wanted to start running—which I'll get to later—and I wasn't about to do that without my own Nike+. So I needed an iPod.

I wish somebody would have told me earlier how awesome having an iPod is. It has changed my life over the past few days. I had always preferred music that didn't come from inside my ears, so I hadn't really done the walk around with headphones thing since my Walkman (I did have a Discman for a while, but it didn't get much use).

Now, I can't get enough of it. It's like I'm in a whole new world and I don't even care about the crazy Japanese shit going on all around me. I was riding my bike home from the electronics store that sits on top of a big hill when "Never Tear Us Apart" by the 80s and 90s sensation INXS shuffled on just as I was approaching my descent. I could just barely hear the outside world in my total Donnie Darko moment (granted, Echo and the Bunnymen would have been better). This benefit will likely cause my death because I also ignore all the traffic.

Another great thing about having an iPod is that when I walk into a store drenched in sweat because I just rode my bike 500 ft. in 90º heat with 90% humidity, it doesn't even matter because I have an iPod. People assume I'm exercising. This is beneficial because the natives don't sweat like we do; I get made fun of for drinking so much water.

The best part is that Apple and Nike have taken something that I need but hate (aimless running) and made it interesting to a geek like me. I can't wait every day to run and listen to the sexy computer chick tell me how far I've run, then plug in my iPod and do all sorts of nerdy computer things with my workouts. Plus, running is way less boring and painful when lost in music. I might even be starting to enjoy the actual running.

Enjoy this likely unrelated quote:

"We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can understand the Universe. That makes us something very special."

—Stephen Hawking